Articles tagged with: love sex and relationships

Mixed status straight couple: the journey of love

published: February, 15, 2016 Categories // Dating, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Joshua Middleton

Joshua Middleton says when you are a straight man, “Finding that special someone can be a complicated enough process without adding HIV into the picture.” But he proved it’s possible to find negative partners who love you.

Mixed status straight couple: the journey of love

It's a complicated enough process without adding HIV into the picture. When I was diagnosed it seemed like an unfathomable possibility to find someone who would accept my status. I thought that my dating “pool” of prospective women to choose from was reduced only to those who were positive. It seemed as if that was the most likely scenario, after all would someone negative really want to be in a relationship with a man just diagnosed with HIV? My mind tricked me into believing that I was

You can't hurry love

published: January, 29, 2016 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Revolving Door, Guest Authors

PositiveLite.com recommends “Navigating sex and disclosure while living with HIV” from POZ.com

You can't hurry love

The full text of this article by Casey Halter first appeared on POZ.com here.  “I don’t want to lie anymore.” Those were the words Robert Gillum thought when he first disclosed to his partner, Michael, in 1994. Having spent the previous seven years in the closet about having HIV—going city to city, job to job and lover to lover across the United States—Gillum recalls that day in Minneapolis as the first time he took responsibility for his status.  To many, the idea of Gillum, bo

Dating, sex and HIV

published: January, 26, 2016 Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Newly Diagnosed, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

Toronto guy Josh, diagnosed in 2014, has decided “I’m happier staying away from dating and I’m happier staying away from sex.”

Dating, sex and HIV

Hoo boy – this is going to be fun to write. I say that because I’m writing on a rather personal topic, and I know for a fact that close friends and a colleague have this link. So… enjoy this one, friends!  On June 9, 2014, I received my HIV diagnosis. From that day forward, I have been single and I have been abstinent. Both of these things have been choices I’ve made for my own well-being and at first, the abstinence decision was made from a place of fear – fear of infecting someon

Eight ways to make an open relationship work

published: January, 07, 2016 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Gay Men, Revolving Door, Guest Authors, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality

FS Magazine says “Guys, I can’t lie to you. The main reason people want an open relationship is because it’s fun.” This is how to do it right.

Eight ways to make an open relationship work

This article by David Blackett @boysies first appeared in FS Magazine, a publication of GMFA, here. Photo © Getty images.  Come one, come all to the hot topic of OPEN RELATIONSHIPS. I can already hear the mumbles: ‘an open relationship isn’t a real relationship’... ‘if I was in love then I wouldn’t need anyone else’... ‘true love is only between two people.’ You guys can shut up, just shut up. Shut. Up.   What you’re saying isn’t helpful and no one here will like you.

I thought telling gay men I’m HIV-positive at speed dating would be easy. I was wrong.

published: December, 10, 2015 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Youth, Newly Diagnosed, Revolving Door, Lifestyle, Guest Authors, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

From the UK's FS Magazine, what happens when an HIV-positive guy goes to a speed dating event planning to tell half the men there he has HIV and the other half he doesn't and compare their reactions to him...

I thought telling gay men I’m HIV-positive at speed dating would be easy. I was wrong.

This article by Ruaidhri O'Baoill @RuaidhriOB  originally appeared in FS Magazine, a publication of GMFA, here.   Over the past year, I have gone from one extreme to the other. The lists of emotions seem endless and every day brings something new to the table.  One which stands out the most is how I feel around other guys. Being honest, my self-esteem has never been great but since becoming HIV-positive, it’s definitely taken a few more knocks.  Before my diagnosis, I often wondered

Sex after HIV

published: December, 07, 2015 Written by // Félix Garmendía Categories // Gay Men, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Sex and Sexuality , Félix Garmendía

Felix Garmendia says “We have all been confronted with the issue of when or even if to have sex again after testing HIV positive.” Here’s how he dealt with it..

Sex after HIV

I tested positive in the 80s, the dark ages of AIDS. I got tested in order to give my then boyfriend a Christmas present, a negative result. I was in an open relationship then. The news froze my libido for a while - the fear of the news, the way it was delivered on the phone by a nurse who callously sounded like she was telling me that I had a simple cold instead of a serious threat to my life. It was received while I was decorating our Christmas tree on the afternoon of December 19th 1989.

Dear Alex

published: December, 07, 2015 Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Population Specific

Toronto guy Josh pens a letter to his ex, the source of his HIV infection – and breaks free in the process

Dear Alex

A friend of mine recently shared this article from 2014 on Facebook, in which the author writes a letter to their ex-partner. The premise got stuck in my head all day today, and I got to thinking what I would want to say to Alex if I had one more chance; because now there are no more phone calls, no more emails… Contact has finally ceased. I know it’s a good thing for my own mental health, but it’s also the first time the void has been there, and it’s… odd. I feel a little lost. That

A keynote speech from the heart

published: December, 02, 2015 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Activism, Gay Men, Events, Revolving Door, Guest Authors, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

We asked Toronto’s David Stempowski, a “short term survivor living with HIV” to share his keynote speech at the Canadian AIDS Society’s recent World AIDS Day gala in Ottawa. We think it’s rather good.

A keynote speech from the heart

My name is David Stempowski. I am the Ontario Regional Director on the Board of the Canadian AIDS Society and this evening I have the honour to be your keynote speaker.  I would like to extend my heartfelt gratitude for your attendance at this evening’s Gala and for your unwavering support and friendship in this fight against HIV that we battle together. Because I am also a short term survivor living with HIV. And I come to you this evening, not only in my role on the Board of the Canadi

Disaster date

published: November, 18, 2015 Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Population Specific

It’s not always about HIV; sometimes dates are just bad, period. Our Toronto guy Josh re-enters the dating pool and finds himself on one such disaster.

Disaster date

After a long hiatus, I re-entered the dating world. It’s 2015, so obviously I resorted to Tinder and OKCupid. I set up my profile, started swiping and waited to see what happened.  Someone messaged me, and seemed nice. We chatted for a bit before we swapped numbers and made plans to have dinner. I did not disclose my status, because I do not sleep with someone on the first date (sorry, TMI) and while I believe in transparency, given that it was just a casual date, I didn’t feel it was ne

Tis’ the season

published: November, 12, 2015 Categories // Gay Men, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

Steven Hobé tells the story of his life with HIV. Part five sees him, not long after diagnosis, disclosing his status to a potential partner. What was the reaction? Read on.

Tis’ the season

It’s now mid-November and time for Toronto’s annual Santa Claus Parade. With that jolly “Ho Ho Ho”, it was a festive nod to the commencement of the Christmas shopping frenzy. All hail to the blow up hanging Santas, oversized Christmas bobbles, and the incessant piped-in choir music with the treble turned up way too high everywhere you turn!  OK, I admit I have a bitter sweet relationship with this time of year. When I was growing up in England, like clockwork, on the 24th, I would ki

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