The last few weeks have been a busy time, work-wise. At the beginning of November I traveled to Vancouver for a week to attend the 7th Annual Gay Men’s B.C. Health Summit with the support of CATIE. I returned to Ottawa after that to participate in the Mister Leather Ottawa Competition as part of the opening number for the popular annual fetish wear event, and fundraised at the event in support of the AIDS Committee of Ottawa . I’ve been busy constructing a brochure to promote Chatter, the young gay men’s HIV+ support group I facilitate, and I’ve been working on creating campaign materials aimed at addressing internalized homophobia, sex-negativity, and racism within our own queer community.

This Saturday I re-launch The Magnet Party, a quarterly poz party started in June of last year that aims to reduce social isolation and depression among HIV+ men and create a safer space for disclosure, networking, and the accessing of educational materials about sexual health and well-being.

This quarter’s event is themed around sex-positivity, with the intention of exploring sexual rights as human rights, harm reduction techniques to reduce HIV transmission during sex, and advocating sex-positivity as vital to reducing our HIV rates and supporting our poz brothers. To do that I’ve enlisted the help of  Montreal‘s Burlesque Troupe Glam Gam Productions, Ottawa’s Capital Tease Burlesque Troupe, Montreal’s DJ Rush'n Noiz!, and the new Mister Leather Ottawa 2012 Isaac Wesley! The Magnet Party takes place at Centretown Pub starting at 10pm. There is no cover.

Mr. Leather 2012 Isaac Wesley himself has his own fundraiser coming up at Centretown Pub, Stamping Out Hunger, in support of Bruce House  on December the 4th starting at 4pm. If you’re in the area I urge you to check it out and bring with you a non-perishable food item to donate. If the cheap beer, tea dance, and charity angle isn’t enough of an incentive to get you to attend, the smouldering Mr. Leather promises not to disappoint with his choice of outfit.

In an interview with New York Magazine actor Zachary Quinto publicly acknowledged his homosexuality for the first time by slipping into the conversation four, no doubt preplanned words; “as a gay man…” Quinto had previously danced around the subject in the press, most notably in the New York Times  stating “I’ve come to realize through experience that ultimately I really do have a lot of power in terms of the way I relate to the public or to people outside of my intimate circle of friends and family. Boundaries are very important to me.”

Quinto’s sexuality was been an open secret in Hollywood, with Perez Hilton, Towleroad, Queerty and other queer blogs criticizing his ambiguity on the issue and the hypocrisy of a closeted gay man filming his own ’It Gets Better’ video. “Of course it's up to Quinto” wrote Towleroad “to decide when and how he comes out, if he is gay, but surely having out and proud examples matters to those considering harming themselves over their sexuality.”  In a well written letter on his blog yesterday Quinto admits to finally coming around to that perspective, writing: “When I found out that Jamey Rodemeyer killed himself - I felt deeply troubled.  But when I found out that Jamey Rodemeyer had made an It Gets Better video only months before taking his own life - I felt indescribable despair.  I also made an It Gets Better video last year - in the wake of the senseless and tragic gay teen suicides that were sweeping the nation at the time -  but in light of Jamey's death - it became clear to me in an instant that living a gay life without publicly acknowledging it - is simply not enough to make any significant contribution to the immense work that lies ahead on the road to complete equality.”

Finally, Quinto had had his light bulb moment, we congratulated him on his late arrival to our queer inner circle, and the world kept spinning. That should have been the end of it right? So, why does news of Zachary Quinto’s coming out have me so fucking angry still? In fact, when I read the news that day I immediately launched into several angry Facebook and Twitter rants about it. What is it about celebrity coming out stories now that succeed in triggering me so deeply that I find it different to articulate my thoughts on the complex issue into writing? 

Well, in part it’s because of my frustration with people like Quinto struggling to recognize that being out and open is paramount to decreasing suicide, depression, social isolation, political oppression, acts of violence, and homelessness among our queer youth. In part it’s because I feel robbed of celebrating his coming out because of the hypocrisy of his actions (filming an It Gets Better video, playing numerous queer roles, attending LGBTQ galas and yet refusing to discuss his sexuality). In part it's because his silence contributed to perpetuating a culture of shame around homosexuality. In part it’s because of the reaction his coming out has been met with by many in the media. Using words like ’brave’, ’courageous’ and ’proud’ to celebrate a 30 something year old man who stayed quite to access heterosexual privilege for the sake of his career does not sit well with me. Being openly queer in Uganda, that’s brave, not coming out in a glossy magazine with an accompanying air brushed photo shoot.

In part it’s because so many queer men will defend the choice of disclosing ones sexuality when ones ready, and ones right to privacy, but not one’s right to privacy and confidentiality around ones own HIV status. Maybe its in part because I am jealous that Quinto’s coming out is being celebrated at all, when my own was met with tears. Perhaps most of all, it makes me angry because, haven had the personal agency at 16 to come out, I’ve dealt with being called a faggot, faced bullying, lost friends, seen relationships with family strained, and just generally faced a lot of hardship, all so I could be authentic to myself and my community and try to make things better for the next guy. Then, to have a  closet case suddenly become the face of my queer culture/identity, feels like my struggles are negated. (A similar sentiment I acknowledge having heard from many older generations of queers about MY generation.)

Coming out is of course a complex situation. I’m not really knocking Zachary Quinto for doing it. I’m thrilled he has finally told us what many already knew. But in response, the reaction shouldn’t be to celebrate his announcement. It should be to examine why it took him so long to tell.

The same day I learned of Quinto’s coming out, I read about the suicide of 15 year old Jamie Hubley in Ottawa. “I don’t want to wait 3 more years [to leave high school]” he wrote on his blog in a final post. “This hurts too much. How do you even know ‘It’ will get better? Its not. I’m tired of life really. Its so hard. I’m sorry, I cant take it anymore.” A fan of the popular television show Glee, Hubley lamented that being openly queer in High School was far harder than his favourite TV show had prepared him for. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore. Jamie Hubley got tired of being called a fag at school. Jamie Hubley got tired of being the only openly gay boy at his school.  Jamie Hubley got tired of fighting for a gay-straight alliance at his school. Jamie Hubley just got too tired to go on. Rest in peace Jamie Hubley. It was supposed to be easier for you. It wasn't. And it breaks my heart. 

Back in May I participated in a photo shoot with photographer Lucyna DanUTA Barossa, Toronto’s Dita Dior, and Ottawa‘s queen of the night Sultanna Corangie. Inspired by a Naomi Campbell pictorial in Interview Magazine, Sultanna had brought us together to help her produce photos that would explore themes of sexuality and violence.

Impressed with the final results, photographer Lucyna DanUTA Barossa encouraged Sultanna to let her shop the photos around, and in September they were published by Guerilla Magazine . Sadly, a month before print, Sultanna passed away from a heart attack.  She was 37.

Below is an excerpt from the obituary I wrote to accompany and contextualize the Guerilla Magazine pictorial. My thanks to Tony Martins for editing the piece. You can read it in full here . Donations in Sultanna’s memory can be made to P.O.W.E.R. (Prostitutes of Ottawa/Gatineau, Work, Educate, Resist) here .

“Her name would be followed, in hushed tones, by mention of her occupation, in much the same way that I imagine my own name is followed by mention of my HIV+ status. It’s an accusatory whisper. They always lower their voice and lean in close to share with you what they know. To warn you that your mutual acquaintance is a social pariah. Whenever I heard her called a whore or a prostitute, I also heard every message board comment, letter to the editor, Public Health nurse, or crush who had rejected me because of my status. They all speak through their words of warning and judgment: as if being a sex worker, or having a disease, somehow makes us undeserving of sex or love or family or respect. My kinship with Sultana began there, as two outsiders in an already marginalised gay community.

She was a smoker. As she laid out her vision for the photo shoot to me, she’d slip her hand into a table-top cigarette holder and pull out the next smoke, leaving discarded, lipstick-kissed blunts smouldering in a sparkling crystal ash tray. She wanted to convey strength and dominance, she said, and explore the contrast between her and her bleak surroundings. As she spoke, she glamorously applied her make-up, chose her outfits, poured wine for me from a decanter, and, of course, smoked.

Looking at the photos now, it’s clear that she was intent on exploring far more than what she described for me then. The fetishization of sexual violence against women, queer gender politics and identity, the resiliency of queer men and women in the face of oppression, anti-body fascism, HIV-phobia, whore-phobia, and expression and exploration of kink—Sultanna and photographer Lucyna Bakowska give rise to many issues for viewers to investigate and discover.

The last time I saw Sultanna we had bumped into each other in the street and she was nervous about writing a piece to go with the pictorial in Guerilla magazine. Unsure of how much to reveal and whether her written English was strong enough to communicate intelligibly, she appreciated my encouragement as we brainstormed. A week later, while she was running a bath, her heart stopped. The water cascaded over the tub, channelled itself around the bends of her apartment walls and out into the hall from underneath her front door. The superintendent was alerted; he found her lifeless body pruning in the running bath. She was 37.

Mere hours after news of her death broke, rumours ran rampant that she had been murdered by a client and was a victim of her own ‘wicked lifestyle‘. Friends would be forced to re-iterate this whore-phobic talk in the press in order to deny it. Her Muslim family, from whom she was estranged, would request a private burial. It seems that they didn’t want Sultana’s fellow sex workers, customers, degenerate friends, fags, and drag queens to show up and pay their respects. Local gay bars were happy to host memorial shows and pub crawls in her honour, however, perhaps for one last chance to make a dollar off Sultana’s name and following. Here, condolences were offered by tipsy party hosts while drunk patrons laughed, danced, and ordered one more bottle of Stella before last call.

Hours before the photo shoot in early April, I had a new tattoo done. The syrupy fake blood we used in the photos stung when it made contact with the tattoo wound. As Sultanna applied generous amounts of it to my torso, arms, and face, I quietly asked her a question. Had she considered that she would be posing with an openly HIV+ person who would appear to be bleeding profusely all over her? Would she be all right with possibly having her own status called into question as a result? Sultanna paused, looked me directly in the eye, and simply said “fuck them.”

Dita and I will always be grateful to have these pictures of our friend, whom we loved, respected, and now miss dearly. She was a joy to be around, an outgoing, generous soul who only wanted to entertain and create beauty out of her surroundings. She was an Algonquin College graphic design graduate who moonlighted as an Arabic goddess, lip-syncing to her signature song “Queen Of The Night” by Whitney Houston and always dominating the stage. As a drag performer, she was one of Ottawa’s best; as a friend, she was even better. She was a pure spirit. And as for anyone who would disagree, fuck them."

Writer Brian Azzarello once again casts Wonder Woman immersed in a world of myth and monsters, once again removing her from the world of modern man and traditional superhero heroics. Disappointingly, Diana has spent so much of her recent superhero career battling Greek Gods and Monsters that the Gods re-appearance in issue #1 is slightly tedious and anti-climatic. Wonder Woman has a wonderful rogues gallery of formidable female foes that are criminally underused; including the Cheetah, Silver Swan, Doctor Cyber, Veronica Cale, and Giganta, and it would have been far more satisfying to see them rebooted and properly used over the inclusion of the Greek Gods yet again. That said, Azzarello's use of locations Virginia, London, and Singapore to tell his story lends a nice scope to the book that makes the threat of the Gods seem more epic and world threatening than before. Artist Cliff Chiang's renderings of the Gods makes them appear far more compelling then they've previously seemed, and the reader is instantly hooked.

Described as a horror book, Cliff Chiang definitely captures the tone in his art, particularly in the birth of Hera's Centaurs. Despite the acclaim that follows Chiang's art, I didn't expect to enjoy it as much as I did. He definitely knows how to draw your eye! Points too for drawing Wonder Woman over 6 foot tall, with a modest bust, and in a non over-sexualized manner. That said, the costume is still atrocious. Loose the choker, arm band, and over sized boots and bring back the pants. The return to star spangled bikini bottoms doesn't read classic, it reads ridiculous. Made all the more obviously so, and jarring, by having grown accustomed to her in pants over the last 14 months.

Interestingly, Azzarello and Chiang introduces the idea that this Wonder Woman makes mistakes, gets dressed like the rest of us (ie. no spin), gets bulled over from the impact of deflecting a weapon, and is never depicted flying (perhaps she can't?) which makes for a far more human character then the demi-Goddess we have grown accustomed too. Toning down her increasingly exaggerated abilities helps create greater suspense in the story and encourages greater investment in the character from the reader. Of all the changes to the character, these have me the most excited.

Wonder Woman issue #1 is by far my favourite re-launch and read so far from D.C.'s The New 52 and I'm looking forward to seeing more from Azzarello and Chiang at the conclusion of this 4 issue story arc. (Brian Azzarello is signed onto Wonder Woman for at least a year.) I bought the last available copy of Wonder Woman from my local comic book shop today. It had sold out in under 3 hours. It looks like I'm not alone in thinking that this Wonder Woman, under the combined talent of Azzarello and Chiang, is a most read. Be sure to leave a comment on this post and let me know what you thought of the amazing amazon's first issue!

P.S. It took a few flips through the book before I spotted the mysteriously hooded female figure that's crept up in all 52 first issues of the re-launch. Did you spot her in Wonder Woman #1?

On August 28th, 2011 on Pride Day in the Nations Capital, I had the honour of speaking at Queer Ontario’s  We (Still) Demand Rally on Parliament Hill about HIV and AIDS.

40 years ago to the day, the first large scale gay rights rally was held on a similarly dark and rainy day by queer men and women who demanded changes to the discriminatory laws that were then restricting their lives. We commemorated the anniversary by making new demands of our Government for further equality and social justice and observed a moment of silence in remembrance of our ally Jack Layton, and those we‘ve lost over the last 40 years. Below I share with you my speech.  

“Hello Everyone, welcome. I’d like to thank Queer Ontario and Casey for making this rally happen and allowing me the privilege to speak to all of you today about a subject that I am passionate about.

Men who have sex with men accounted for 44% of estimated new HIV infections in 2008. In 2011 we have seen a spike in new HIV infections. I have a single demand to make of our Government in response to these statistics. I demand evidence trump ideology. I want to see a Public Health response to HIV and AIDS that isn’t about politics, but about doing what is in the best interest of our community’s health and well-being. Because all the information is there, the sociological studies, the epi-data, the testimonials and science, to dictate what course of action to take against HIV and AIDS in Canada. Prevention efforts have failed, and rates have grown to ’beginning of the epidemic’ numbers not because we haven’t learned from our mistakes as Health Care Providers, AIDS Service Workers, Volunteers, and Social Justice Advocates, but because we are not allowed to adopt the changes that need to be made to successfully curb our transmission rates!

Such as comprehensive, sex-positive, pleasure-centric, sex education in schools. Challenging sex-negative societal views and embracing STI and HIV/AIDS campaign materials that are sexually explicit and on point. Allowing AIDS Service Organizations to do more than just 10% advocacy work within a year without threat of losing their Government funding. Creating safer injection sites in Ottawa and removing red zones. Having our Community Centres, Police, Health Care and Service Providers work from an anti-oppression/anti-racist framework. Allowing prison tattoo programs and ending the Criminalization of HIV-non disclosure (You’ll hear more about that from my friend and college Brent Bauer but I‘d like to encourage everyone here to continue to press the Attorney General to draft prosecutorial guidelines as quickly as possible. We are asking community members to contact the Attorney General, the Honourable Chris Bentley, and urge him to draft prosecutorial guidelines by the end of August! He needs to be challenged on what constitutes significant risk and be reminded that HIV stigma and discrimination is bullshit!)

I have a long list of changes that the Government has repeatedly failed to champion, of programs they have repeatedly failed to allow, that truly WOULD make a direct impact on HIV rates in Canada.

I want people gathered here today to know, that it is not so-called irresponsible, sexually reckless youth, promiscuous back room barebacking homo’s, or men on the ‘down low’ who are driving our rates of HIV infection, it’s the fucking Government and our social determinates of health! Did you know, if everyone in the world had access to shelter, nutrition, health care, and treatment, we would see a 75% decrees in HIV transmission in 3 to 5 years? Sounds like the Government has its work cut out for them, huh!

We are all capable of demanding more from our Government, Leaders, Public Figures, and Police. This year Ottawa’s Dyke March made a powerful statement when they refused to give community money to the Ottawa Police Services to marshal their walk. Amongst cases of sexual abuse against women, the labelling of an HIV+ man as a sexual predator and releasing his name, sexual-orientation, and status to the media, police arresting demonstrators at the Trans Day of Remembrance, conducting monthly sweeps of street-based sex workers, police brutality, and their hostility toward harm reduction, the Dyke March made a strong declaration that we are a criminalized community and that the Police have long not been our friend. No revisionist history on the part of the media or Police should blind us to our persecution.

As a result perhaps of their stand, the cops were aggressive yesterday at the Dyke March, yelling at marchers, making fun of the marshals, charging someone, harassed homeless people in Dundonald Park and just generally being jerks.

Our LGBTQ Police Liaison committee has failed to improve our relations with law enforcement. I encourage everyone here to contact the Ottawa Police Chief directly and share with him your concerns about the direction and actions of our Police. I also encourage everyone to write to our Pride Committee and ask that our Police are not included in our Pride. We do not have to work with, or support our Police when they do not represent the ideals of Pride and continue to harasses queer, poor, non-status, trans, racialized, sex-workers, indigenous, disabled and the homeless.

Queer men and women are resilient. We are gathered here today because we recognize that Pride is political, and not just a corporate kegger, and we want to see change. We have come a long way in the last thirty years fighting HIV and AIDS, and we have even longer to go, but if we start to speak openly and honestly about sex and HIV, and hold our Government accountable, we can truly bring change to our community and make our futures healthier. Thank you.”

North American comics have long been the domain of men. Statistically so far this year for Marvel and D.C. Comics, an average of 88% of comic book content is produced by men, from writers, inkers, and pencillers, to editors and letterers. The comic book business’s short sightedness about maintaining it’s ‘boy’s club’ when it comes to collaborators has tellingly resulted in the alienation of it’s female readers and D.C. Comics in particular doesn’t seem to care about fixing it . In September, D.C. Comics will launch/reboot 52 titles, only 7 of which star a solo, or an all female group.

In one month the women of the D.C. Universe will find themselves regressed in age, the only disabled woman in a D.C. comic will be made to walk, marriages will be dissolved , children will be erased, others will be de-powered, and some queer characters (and the only HIV+ one) will go missing, yet  D.C. Comics has called it’s “new direction”, “accessible”, “diverse”, and questions “whether we're being bold enough".

I can answer that question for them; D.C. your not. Japan’s Manga Comics long ago sought out female talent to attract female readership and now boosts an impressive amount of female and queer fans from all over the world. Women writing for women produced characters that were sexy,  relatable, authentic, and smart. Male writers in North America never made it past sexy.

Ok, maybe that’s harsh. I love comic books, and theirs no denying the talent of some of my favorite male writers and artists, but the lack of diversity behind the scenes has definitely shown itself on the pages of Marvel and D.C. Comics. Does D.C. really think they’ll capture new readers by simply dressing up their hero’s in new threads?  Will this stunt really translate into increased sales and longevity even as cover prices rise and piracy grows? Or could they truly bring about change by  addressing a larger audience and speaking more to women.

Maybe they're afraid women and their gay best friends will ruin one of the last bastions of male heterosexuality if there invited to participate in the medium?  Witness the gay panic that erupts when the hyper-sexualisation of women starts to influence artists renderings of male characters , and the comic industry’s hetero-normative, misogynistic, and homophobic  response. For instance, what happens when the hyper-sexualisation of female characters starts to influence and spread to bastions of  hyper-masculinity like the male super hero Citizen Steel? Well there’s a moral panic from male fans and industry vets alike of course!

When the male hero in tights was drawn by Alex Ross sporting a true to life basket, D.C. comics neutered him by print time, rendering the character a Ken doll on the cover of Justice Society of America #7. Now years later, another D.C. male hero is set to grace the cover of his title sporting a crotch rocket  and blogs are once again speculating if the cover will see print. God forbid women and queer men get turned on! Of course empowered women and sexualized male heroes aren’t the only thing the men over at D.C. Comics are scared of. There also deathly afraid of Muslims and pissing off Fox News. 

Women, queers, and other minorities in comics, both on the page and behind the scenes, are definitely having a rough go of it. 70 years ago, Wonder Woman’s male creator William Moulton Marston thought that by creating a female super hero, he could influence boys relationships and opinions of women, and help create equality between the sexes. He believed comics could be a tool for social change and social justice. And yet, all this time later, women are still struggling to break into the business,  female characters continue to be written almost exclusively by men, and despite introducing dozens of new characters during D.C.’s “The New 52” campaign, there are no new queer characters to speak of. There is no question in my mind, D.C. Comics, and the industry at large, is in much need of a women's touch to save it.