Lifestyle

Sex after diagnosis: my journey to believing that undetectable HIV viral load means uninfectious

published: February, 20, 2017 Written by // Joshua Middleton Categories // Social Media, Activism, Dating, As Prevention , Treatment Guidelines -including when to start, Mental Health, Sexual Health, Health, International , Treatment, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Joshua Middleton

Joshua Middleton tells of how he addressed self-stigma and maintained a sexual identity post-diagnosis.

Sex after diagnosis: my journey to believing that undetectable HIV viral load means uninfectious

To read the entire  article by Joshua Middleton, visit TheBody.com, here. An image of the moment I was diagnosed HIV positive remains vivid in my mind. The feelings and emotions that ran through my body like a lightening bolt that day are not easily forgotten. They will be with me forever, as will my feeling of infectiousness upon hearing the words that have played in my mind like a broken record all these years: "Josh, I am sorry, but you are HIV positive." I remember telling myself that

Toronto's Dennis Battler says he's a "Seq Worker". But what does he mean?

published: February, 15, 2017 Written by // Dennis Battler Categories // Yoga, Social Media, Gay Men, General Health, Mental Health, Spirituality, Dennis Battler, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces

Dennis Battler on how staying sane takes work

Toronto's Dennis Battler says he's a

Asked recently how I spend my time, a clear simple answer was hardly suitable. Yet to offer an accurate statement would take the entire evening. Spending the next few days pondering a succinct reply, irony speaks most loudly in my ear. Ready for the next time this question comes up, "Seq Worker" will be the response. Confusing and throwing the inquirer off balance – off balance because, firstly they would have to admit they know the term; secondly because they would be astonished to be in t

I am HIV-positive. This is what it's like to date.

published: February, 09, 2017 Written by // Guest Authors - Revolving Door Categories // Dating, Social Media, Mental Health, Women, Sexual Health, Revolving Door, International , Guest Authors, Lifestyle, Living with HIV

Must-read from Redbook: Dating after a breakup is hard enough — now add being HIV positive to that.

I am HIV-positive. This is what it's like to date.

To read the complete article by Karen Fratti visit Redbook, here. I was living in New York City with a boyfriend I'll call Matt when I was diagnosed with HIV. I was 28 and he was just hitting 35. It was my first steady, long-term relationship, and we did what I used to think of as "grown-up" things. Like having Sunday football parties or fighting in Home Depot about what color to paint an accent wall in our living room. We made complex weekday dinners to distract ourselves from the fact th

2017 and I’m not Nostradamus.

published: February, 06, 2017 Written by // Colin Johnson Categories // African, Caribbean and Black, Social Media, Aging, Gay Men, Colin Johnson, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces

On "self-imposed social inactivity".As 2017 opens, Colin Johnson knows where he is and what he'd like to see, even though the future looks cloudy.

2017 and I’m not Nostradamus.

I haven’t written for a while. Sorry Bob, it's not because I can’t think of a topic; quite the contrary there are so many topics. For example, I kept agreeing with the consensus that 2016 sucked. However, in re-examining the year, I’m forced to admit that as a Long-Term Survivor (LTS) it was no different than the last ten years. I lost friends. I’m still on disability which really limits one’s life possibilities. There’s a sense of depressing regularity which naturally I counter w

Embracing a positive life

published: January, 24, 2017 Written by // Billy Santo Categories // Dating, Gay Men, Youth, Newly Diagnosed, Billy Santo, International , Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific

New blogger Billy Santo from the Philippines, living with HIV since May 2015, tells his story of hard times, redemption and making a difference

Embracing a positive life

I have had a difficult life. My mom committed suicide when I was three years old and my dad had a heart attack when I was nine. I am a product of child abuse, being passed from one relative to another. I was lost on track when I reached college where I decided to run away from my uncle who had treated me like an animal and went on searching for a place where I could survive. I begged from strangers, asked them to keep me in their homes in exchange for labor. I met up with many gay men for mo

Jeff Potts is home and doing well – but still facing major challenges

published: December, 22, 2016 Written by // Jeff Potts Categories // Health, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Jeff Potts

Our popular Ottawa-based contributor Jeff Potts who suffered a stroke a few months ago provides a pre-Christmas update on how he is doing

Jeff Potts is home and doing well – but still facing major challenges

I am so incredibly glad to be home from hospital, but can't deny that being at home has meant making some significant adjustments.  I am improving every single day, but still have a long recovery road ahead I think. I am eating regular foods, but have some lingering affect in my throat and neck muscles, so my diet remains restricted (no mixed textures; no clear fluids while eating... so no chicken soup, lol).  I am walking, but very slowly and not without a mobility device (walker or cane).

Festive dessert time: How to make a really good trifle

published: December, 22, 2016 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Food, Nutrition and Recipes, Lifestyle, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy shares his mother’s recipe for a dessert that will wow guests, visually and otherwise, the old fashioned way

Festive dessert time: How to make a really good trifle

Bob’s homemade trifle  Trifle; definition: 1. a thing of little value or importance 2. British: a cold dessert of sponge cake and fruit covered with layers of custard, jelly, and cream. If ever there were two definitions of the same word that are contrary to each other, trifle is that word. Dessert is seldom unimportant and when trifle is on the menu, it most definitely isn’t. I don’t think there can be many desserts so simple to create – anyone can do this - with such a high w

(Un)Happy Holidays

published: December, 19, 2016 Written by // Michael Yoder Categories // Social Media, Gay Men, Mental Health, Health, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Michael Yoder

Michael Yoder on HIV and the holidays: "... the real purpose of Winter festivities is not to be happy, but to find belonging..."

(Un)Happy Holidays

"Holidays in general breed unrealistic expectations. The minute you start wondering, 'is it going to be wonderful enough?,' it never will be." --Pepper Schwartz "...If I could work my will," said Scrooge indignantly, "every idiot who goes about with 'Merry Christmas on his lips, should be boiled with his own pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart..." --Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol It's that time of year where we're all supposed to be full of joy and light and love

Going on vacation

published: November, 21, 2016 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Gay Men, Travel, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Bob Leahy - Publisher

The simple act of saying that he’s going on vacation in the US raises multiple issues for Editor Bob Leahy, from guilt to politics to religion. (When did life get this complicated?) But he’s going anyway.

Going on vacation

Live oaks with Spanish moss, typical South Carolina scenery It’s odd but whenever I talk about my vacation plans I get pangs of guilt. It shouldn’t be this way, I know. Vacations, post-HIV infection and more importantly post-U.S. election, should be a break from everything that irks, not a source of irk. (Is that a word? Hang on. It’s a verb not a noun. Close enough!)  The vacation itself isn’t terribly grand or expensive. Twelve days. A two-day drive down to Hilton Head, South Caro

Addicted at work - an insider speaks

published: November, 14, 2016 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Gay Men, Mental Health, Features and Interviews, Health, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Population Specific , Bob Leahy - Publisher

Bob Leahy talks in-depth to Eric Cashmore, a person living with HIV who works at a northern Ontario AIDS Service Organization about Eric’s ongoing struggle with his addictions, and about the help he receives from the workplace to deal with them

Addicted at work - an insider speaks

Bob Leahy: Thanks for talking to PositiveLite.com first of all. I really appreciate it. Now tell me why you wanted to talk to me, Eric. Eric Cashmore: This is something I had to consider very carefully Bob. Just a couple of weeks ago I had a talk with my employer where I was being very public within my office, and I realized I had started to cause distress amongst people around me talking so openly about my addiction issues and how I’m handling them and people became very worried with me. S

Thought for the day. Do HIV and aging lead to extreme crankiness?

published: November, 02, 2016 Written by // Bob Leahy - Publisher Categories // Aging, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Bob Leahy - Publisher

Thought for the day. Do HIV and aging lead to extreme crankiness? That’s one theory of our editor Bob Leahy, trying to figure out why he’s gradually becoming the proverbial cranky old man, with HIV along for the ride.

Thought for the day. Do HIV and aging lead to extreme crankiness?

Am I turning into a curmudgeon? (Dictionary definition for all those out there who don’t read: “a person, especially an old man, who is easily annoyed or angered and who often complains?)  They say our character is partly the product of our life experience, partly genetic, partly upbringing. But if you are approaching curmudgeonary (curmudgeonhood?) how much of it is shaped by HIV? Does the virus infiltrate not only our body but our minds, turning us sweet and patient things, there to gi

Check it out!!! 2016 fall styles!!!

published: October, 28, 2016 Written by // Philip Minaker - Style Categories // Social Media, Gay Men, Lifestyle, Opinion Pieces, Philip Minaker

PositiveLite.com's Philip Minaker with an overview of 2016 fall fashion trends.

Check it out!!! 2016 fall styles!!!

A new season has arrived and that means a new approach to dressing. For many, Fall denotes change and new beginnings. Commencing a new academic year during our youth is probably the reason why many of us have taken a particular shining to Fall. Despite the anxieties that we may have initially experienced, including what to wear, we began to embrace the possibilities of new opportunities enthusiastically as the years advanced. For many, translating fashion into personal style is a process, l

Knowing the value of self worth, part two: putting aside the fear

published: October, 14, 2016 Written by // Patrick Italo Ettenes Categories // African, Caribbean and Black, Social Media, Gay Men, Mental Health, International , Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Patrick Italo Ettenes

"I smile with pride for any other person I can see who looks happy and content to be braving the world as a single person," says Patrick Ettenes

Knowing the value of self worth, part two: putting aside the fear

We don't all appreciate our own unique qualities and I believe that a lot of us don't know our own self worth. That is one thing that was stripped from me over the last few years. I was reminded by my dear mummy of who I was and where I came from and the dignity that was bred into us and suddenly the "self worth" light flipped on. I shouldn't have allowed it to go out in the first place. Do you know why you cause a smile on that someone's face when you pass? Do you know why your best mate cal

The importance of self care

published: October, 06, 2016 Categories // Yoga, Social Media, Gay Men, Food, Nutrition and Recipes, General Health, Mental Health, Fitness and Exercise, Health, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Opinion Pieces, Jason Cole

"Now I know the true value of taking care of myself and what that means," says Maya Cole

The importance of self care

As a young child in elementary school, I was a crafty and resourceful young soul. I had to be. Protection was the name of the game and the players were the many bullies that would make school difficult, everyday. My resourcefulness paid off in the way of escapism from my bullies’ relentless attacks. I had mapped out the entire school yard. Everything was colour-coded, even the trees and neighboring houses. Strongly depicted were my ‘safe zones’. They were the places I would run to w

I’m sorry, this job may not be right for you!

published: October, 03, 2016 Written by // Wayne Bristow - Positive Life Categories // Aging, Social Media, Gay Men, Health, Lifestyle, Living with HIV, Media, Opinion Pieces, Wayne Bristow

"It’s never too late to learn a new skill or dream a new dream." says Wayne Bristow

I’m sorry, this job may not be right for you!

I suppose I could be a poster boy for what I’m writing about today. I set out to write about people who are doing work they aren’t qualified for, are unprepared for, or who are working at a job they don’t even want to do. Instead it's become an ‘I’ story, about me. That was probably a wise decision, I’m not in a place to judge. Many years ago I was hired to work in a factory. I had just re-united with my family and it was a time when I really needed to work to support them. We mo

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