Most websites have, pardon the expression, a back end which can analyze traffic and PositiveLite.com is no exception. So it's easy for us too see what collectively you like to read.

That latter point is endlessly fascinating – at least to us – and is the subject of today’s post.  Your top ten most popular posts, based on traffic in the last six months, are a mix of the serious and the not so serious, the old and the new. I think you’ll be entertained by revisiting all ten of them.

1. Len Tooley on PreP, part one.

This was the first in an excellent three-part interview by publisher John McCullagh that featured HIV-negative prevention educator Len Tooley’s decision to regularly take anti-HIV drug Truvada as a risk reduction strategy.  This very human interview is both a great read and a primer in the pros and cons of taking PreP that answers many of the practical and emotional questions people have about it. No surprise that the article was picked up by outside news sources and translated in to several languages.

2. I’m on antivirals and undetectable. What about Safe Sex? 

Given that this article speaks to one of THE big issues of the day for many HIVers, it’s no surprise that this interview with researcher Rupert  Kaul on the impact of undetectable viral load has drawn so much attention.  Read it carefully and you’ll be ahead of the pack in understanding things like how risky is sex without condoms and what are the chances of finding dangerous levels of virus in the semen when your blood viral load is undetectable.

3. More homoerotic ads 

Readers find posts in different ways. This older one has clearly been a perennial favourite with people googling “prison shower scene video” obviously the main attraction here.  And why not – it's clever, funny and hot.  We like it because it shows our readership is not too HIV obsessed and has a sense of humour too.

4. My relationship status

Former PosiitiveLite.com writer Michael Burtch returned for this guest post and – boy – did he cause a stir! A blisteringly honest post about what he as a poz guy wants out of sex and the need for real intimacy, it divided readership down the middle. Love it or hate it, and many people did (calling Michael “psychotic” and “criminal”), this is a must read for those trying to understand the impact of undetectable viral load in the real world. 

5. Roberto Alomar – is he still playing games? 

Clearly another google hit, this almost three year old post drawing on rumours of the day just won’t go away. Who knows  - or even cares anymore - if now retired baseball player Roberto Alomar is poz? But the news continues to bubble and Alomar continues to claim he is neg, while lawsuits swirl around him contending he’s poz.  The curious can get an update on his legal battles here. 

6. Changing my mind on treatment as prevention

This quite recent heart-on-sleeve post is another one that has been picked up by several national and international  news source. As the title implies it’s a highly personal take on one of the hottest HIV issues of the day.  Perhaps why it has appealed to many though, and likely annoyed many others, is its point-by-point dissection of the various arguments against treatment as prevention and why they no longer, at least in the writer’s eyes,  look so good. Controversial stuff, this!

7. Neuropathy and HIV – a progress report

When we signed up Netherlands poz guy Dave R to write for us last year, we landed a gem. The always readable Dave serves up regular helpings of his well researched thoughts on  - well, just about anything.  But his area of true expertise is peripheral neuropathy, of which he knows well first hand.  One of the world’s leading experts on this topic, he’s highly readable to boot and this post is no exception.

8. Sex = fun? Explicit pro-pleasure videos bring "sexy back" to HIV awareness

This article came to us from a content-sharing agreement we have with TheBody.com.  It’s a fascinating look at some HIV prevention videos which go one step further than most (or maybe three). But it’s likely the words “explicit sex videos” in the title didn’t hurt in drawing in the googlers.

9. Bisexuality on the Big Bang Theory

I must admit I’ve never looked at this show in the same way since reading this post from Guelph’s Megan DePutter on ultimate nerd gal Amy’s  sexual and entirely unreturned attraction to Penny. There are few if any other bisexual characters on TV and the fact that this is played out on prime time so blatantly warms our hearts.  Plus of course, the show is hilarious. Thanks, Megan, for this.

10. Len Tooley on PrEp, part three

See 1. Above. Readers clearly coudn’t get enough of Len’s wonderfully honesty and insightful words. If you haven't read this, or parts one and two, you are missing out on being up to speed on perhaps the next big thing in HIV prevention. And understanding how people can make a difference to our perceptions by sharing their stories. 

Remember that time you went to that awesome restaurant, ordered a fantastic meal, everyone enjoyed it, then you realised at the end you didn’t have the money for to pay for it?  No? 

OK, how about that great drive up the coast you always wanted to do? The people you met, the things you saw, everything was awesome – but you ran out of petrol three-quarters of the way there. Had that happen?

These are metaphors, of course.  I like using them, as well as satire, which often leaves readers dazed, confused, and thinking I’m a wanker.  I also stray off the point from time to time.

So here it is:

This will be the last Bipolar Bear blog entry. I don’t know if I will start up again at this stage. Some of my reasons will be clear by better explanation of the metaphors above.

Firstly, my grandmother is dying. This is the second close family member to go in under a year and, as I alluded to yesterday, it’s time to focus on the things that matter.

Second, there isn’t enough of me to go around. Much as I get a great deal out of writing and interacting with you all through this medium, I’m starting to get tired – literally. I often sleep through entire weekends. Other things, besides family, are demanding my attention in a way I can no longer ignore.

This blog began as a part of my work at the Mental Health Foundation in New Zealand. Indeed it was publicly supported as such. A year later, there was debate within the organisation as to whether a blog dedicated to gay men’s mental health and wellbeing fitted with the Foundation’s work.  Similar debates were had around the project that was to become my documentary, “Men Like Us”.

I left the organisation and funded the completion of “Men Like Us” personally – this is nothing new to me, all but one of my films have been paid for out of my own pocket.  The result was better than I could have imagined – apart from the high-profile and excellent blockbuster doco “Untouchable Girls” – it’s the only gay-themed documentary from New Zealand to ever be released in cinemas, and receive glowing reviews from critics and viewers alike. That’s a testament to the power of the nine men’s stories contained within it.

While I continue to believe there is immense social value in films by and about gay men, there is not a great deal of financial value in them in terms of profit.

The cost of completing “Men Like Us”, supporting it through a theatrical release in New Zealand and getting it onto television, and subsequently onto DVD and download are still being recouped.

I have also incurred considerable debt underwriting the productions made by my charitable film-making trust, Number 8 Films, which my co-trustee Andy Jalfon described in Express recently as coming to a natural end.

This is broadly true, in the sense that if you sprint non-stop for fifty kilometres, things will come to a natural end when you collapse on the pavement gasping for breath and needing to be defibrillated.

I’m really proud to have instigated monthly gay film nights in Auckland, which ran at a loss for several months until we convinced a couple of key sponsors to come on board – Get It On and the GABA Charitable Trust. This support was great, as the events could not have been run without it. Cinema hire, film hire and censorship is an expensive business for a niche audience, as anyone who runs a gay film festival will tell you.

The administration of these events, including negotiation with distributors, putting films through the New Zealand censorship process, writing promo copy for media, liaising with the cinema over ticketing and promotion, is time-consuming as well. I continued to do all of this until the film nights ended in February of this year, despite the fact I’ve been living in Australia since August.

So, to quote David Bowie’s fantastic comeback single, where are we now?

We are tired, and we are in debt. We meaning me. I need to recharge my energy and my finances. I need to focus on my family. I need to find new ways of working and expressing myself creatively after being worn down by more than a decade of being surrounded by “no” people; be it “no you can’t do that”, “no we won’t support that”, or “no I haven’t got time to help you”.

I’d like to thank each and every person out there that has enjoyed the writings, the films, the events, have been moved by them, shared them with friends, bought DVDs – all those forms of support which have made it worthwhile to keep going through the tougher periods.

But for now, it’s time to shut the door on the vault and say “game over”.

Then place people I don’t like in a series of elaborate traps in which they’re hacked into Findus lasagne pieces (just kidding).

I trust you will understand.

This article first appeared on Christopher’s own blog here.  

The short answer is, we didn’t win. But that’s misleading. There is so much more to the story.

On Friday April 5, as I whipped into the parking lot and dashed into the office, my heart was beating. It was our last chance to get the final votes.  I hadn’t slept much the night before, and thanks to a persistent cold, my throat was raw and I could barely speak.  I lit up my computer to send out last minute pleas for help through email, Facebook and Twitter, reminding anyone who cared (and probably some who did not) that we had only hours – and then minutes – left to win Canada’s Worst Charity Website.

I have been told that many of our supporters anxiously refreshed their browsers over and over again, waiting to see the final tally. What they didn’t know is that the company who hosted the contest, rTraction, was monitoring votes and would strip the final numbers of any that looked illegitimate.  We wouldn’t know the final tally until an hour later.

Both myself and Wayne have written previous posts on why this contest is important to us. We want to make our HIV prevention and support services more accessible online.  We do this work within the confines of certain barriers – including the fact that stigma, isolation (both social and geographical) make face-to-face conversations about HIV, AIDS and STIs difficult. For many hard-to-reach populations, including those who live in rural areas and those who fear stigma, discrimination or racism, a website is often a primary access point to information. For us, this was about bridging barriers.

Shortly after 1:00, our Executive Director, Tom, went into his office to answer the telephone and I knew right away the news wasn’t good.  From his office, he gave me a thumbs down.

I didn’t understand then, why he sounded so chipper. “We’re thrilled,” I heard him say a few minutes later.

When Tom gathered all the staff together for an announcement, he told us what I already suspected – we didn’t win first place. But rTraction had been so impressed with our enthusiasm and hard work, they decided to offer us a second prize that was nearly as great – a website makeover worth $15,000!

We are truly thrilled to accept this prize. The development will take place in 2014. I really look forward to having a user-friendly, responsive, and professional website.

Beyond that though, this process has been really enlightening. It’s been incredibly moving to see the kind of community involvement we’ve received. I say involvement, because it’s gone beyond the simple act of voting. Our supporters took a major role promoting the contest by sharing, tweeting, emailing, blogging, Facebooking – and plain old talking about the contest.  They designed memes. They gave free advice. One physicist friend actually wrote a computer program to help monitor and analyze the voting trends. And this support wasn’t only found in the Guelph community (although the Guelph community has been a huge source of support – including voluntary associations, social services and nonprofit organizations, the university, the Mayor and countless other organizations and individuals).  The support and involvement extended across the region, the province, the nation – even the globe! Friends spread the word in multiple languages.

We utilized social media as well as traditional media. We worked hard to get the HIV & AIDS community involved as much as possible, asking for help from as many HIV/AIDS affiliated organizations across Canada (and into the United States and beyond) to help us – and that included the fabulous PositiveLite.com blogging community!

The really cool thing is when you start to see your voters become promoters. That especially took off as our supporters learned why this contest was so important. It wasn’t just about getting a great website so that we could solicit donations. It was about making sure that life-saving information was available to people as they need it. It was about overcoming significant barriers like stigma, shame, isolation and fear.  Supporters began to learn more about us and the issues we faced, and they started to share this information with their own networks.

Here’s an example.  I saw an acquaintance – who has no affiliation with the AIDS Committee - post this on Facebook when encouraging her friends to vote:

Not only is the AIDS Committee of Guelph an organization deserving of and in need of a new website, but the nature of their work means that having a well designed site that's easy to use is extremely important as social stigma, fear and a host of other issues might mean it's their first (or only) point of contact with some individuals needing their services.

It is inspiring to see how our messages have circulated through social media, prompting individuals outside our circles to learn, share and talk about HIV.  It seems this contest has helped us raise awareness of who we are, what we do, and most importantly, the issues that we work to address every day.

More than 15,000 votes were sent in favour of the AIDS Committee of Guelph. I’m told it was a very close call – that we lost only by a hundred or so.  I also recently learned that our total was more than double the amount of the winning organization from last year.  The fact that we came so close to winning while competing against an organization based in Ottawa – a city that dwarfs Guelph in size and political power – is incredibly inspiring.  It is a testament to how much our supporters care for this agency and its cause. It also speaks to how the HIV & AIDS sector works as a family. 

With this contest we have heightened our local and global response to HIV and AIDS – and that has truly been our most important goal, regardless of winning or losing this contest.

On behalf of the staff and Board of Directors at the AIDS Committee, I would like to express their heartfelt thanks for everyone who voted and promoted the contest.  A special thank you also to rTraction, from London Ontario, for hosting Canada’s Worst Charity Website contest and congratulations to the Wild Bird Care Centre of Nepean Ontario on their win.

I have some amazing friends for you to meet. 

Beginning two years ago, TheBody.com asked me to produce a series of videos (“A Day in the Life: Keeping Up With Your HIV Meds”) that would profile a person living with HIV, what their day looks like, and how their medication regimen fits into their daily routine. It was a great opportunity to highlight the everyday lives of people living with HIV, but also to let their spirit and passions come through, and show we are whole people — not simply the virus.

The profile subjects came from all walks of life, in various cities around the United States, and their personalities and interests — their families, their hobbies, and even how they became HIV positive — were all I needed for inspiration.

Below are the eleven videos that have been produced to date for the series (an ongoing feature on TheBody.com). They are each less than ten minutes long; just scroll through them below and find a story that sounds like yours — or better yet, hear what the journey of someone completely different from you is like! Are you ready?

Episode 1: Damaries Cruz

Damaries is from South Florida and could not have been more lovely; we laughed a lot during our day together. Her strength is what impressed me most: she did not come to the decision to start HIV medications lightly. She really did her research before she began a regimen. Filming her story was also a great excuse to hit the beach, since she loves to find her peace and tranquility on that gorgeous sand.

Click here to read the rest of Mark’s article from his blog, My Fabulous Disease.

The AIDS Committee of Guelph & Wellington County is currently entered in a contest to win Canada’s Worst Charity Website. It’s a self-deprecating title for sure but one that we’re more than willing to accept. Why? Because this is a contest that awards the winner with a $20,000 website makeover.

One of the reasons we’re so eager to win this opportunity is because we know how important a good website is to the population we serve. A lot of people access health information online. Especially information about HIV. Let’s face it, it takes a lot of courage to have a frank, open discussion about sex – and especially about HIV, STIs and unprotected sex. This is even more so considering how many different types of sex are stigmatized or considered socially deviant thanks to homophobia, sexism, and, in my opinion, narrow definitions of what is considered to be normal, healthy, sexual behaviour. Our sexual practices are a lot more diverse that we openly admit, but that doesn’t mean that people don’t need access to information about risk and HIV. 

We also know that more and more people are accessing websites through their phone or mobile devices. This is one of the reasons we created the iPhone app. We want to help people get the information they need when they want it, how they want it. To us, this is part of meeting people where they’re at, and part of being accessible. Getting access to information on a mobile device can be really useful, for instance, if you are in the middle of sexual decision making, negotiating safer sex, or trying to determine where to get tested. Mobile devices are really helpful because they are just that – mobile. We’d love to have a website that is friendly to mobile devices.

Our funds go where they are intended and where they are most deserving – to programming for people living with, affected by, and at risk to HIV & AIDS. We simply don’t have the funds to spend on web design, something that could be considered an “overhead” cost. But at the same time, we really believe that a great website would have an important educational benefit, and we’ve been excited about the prospect of being able to make it happen.

Our biggest competition right now seems to be the Ferret Aid Society and the Wild Bird Care Centre. Please vote for us! You can vote once a day, every day until April 5 at www.worstcharitywebsite.ca. Just head to the website and then click “vote” under ACG. Thank you for your help!