When I first met Dodger he was pretty beaten up. He was  very shy. He had stitches all over and had to wear a cone to keep himself from biting or scratching them. He had on a diaper and his eyes were filled with goop.

It was raining when he arrived and Phillip had to sneak out in order to prevent him from panicking. Originally I was only going to foster him until he was adopted, as I wanted a dog a little bigger than him.

However right away something about him felt right. Dodger was homeless and in need of love, respect and a great place to live. I don’t need to tell you just how much this little dog spoke to my soul because just like me he was starting over in a new place after going through a hard time. Our bond was fast and within 24 hours I knew I wanted to keep this little guy.

I took him to his first adoption and I just knew someone was going to ask for him, but shortly after we arrived, Phillip asked if I wanted to keep him and without hesitation I said yes and as the saying goes the rest is history, or should I say history in the making? Whatever it was, Dodger has been nothing short of a massive blessing for my life. Not only did he steal my heart, he’s done the same with all my friends. Everyone loves Dodger.

Dodger was two when he came into my life, but on January 15 he celebrated his 5^th birthday and his 3^rd year with me. Since I didn’t know his exact birthday I picked the first day we met as his birthday. In keeping up with this little dog I’ve tried to make Dodger just as happy as he makes me, so each birthday has to be special. Even if he does something that pisses me off.

Dodger has been to all the cool dog parks here in Los Angeles and, like me, he loves Santa Monica Beach and playing in the sand at Malibu. He likes hikes in Runyon Canyon as well as Griffith Park, but it’s a local neighborhood park where he seems to come to life. It’s where he plays well with other dogs and has a great time. It’s been so cool to see him do this because I think Dodger tends to think he is a human and playing with other dogs is somehow beneath him.

As anyone who has met him will tell you, Dodger has a personality that is all his own  - with some strong characteristics borrowed from me. When he does not want to be bothered he will ignore you. He demands to be stroked by everyone he likes. There are those who he starts out liking, but then changes his mind and barks at them when he sees them.  When he is ready to leave he will act out and bark and if he poops in your place that’s just his way of saying “nice to meet you.”

Dodger can go from being very chill to high energy at the drop of a hat. He loves to chill on the back of the sofa and look out the window or sit on my lap and watch TV, but he also loves to destroy his toys as quickly as he can. If something catches his eye outside the widow then he will let them know he sees them and wants to play with them.

Dodger takes great care of me when I’m not feeling my best and when I’ve had a bad day. He will sit on my feet or lay right beside me and will even lick my face as if to say “everything's going to be ok”. But the thing that I love the most about Dodger is how he welcomes me home. It’s always so nice when he goes crazy when he hears my voice outside and rushes to the window to bark as loud as he can to let me and everyone know just how happy he is to see me. Although sometimes I think he’s asking me where the hell I’ve been.

When I arrived at LAX from my trip to DC he was at the airport to greet me. As soon as he saw me he went bonkers, pulling on his leash trying to get away from my best friends. Once I walked over to him he jumped all over me. Even when I went to the Bay Area for a wedding and he remained at the hotel Dodger showered me with love and kisses when I returned. But the best is when I walk through the front door of our apartment and he comes charging at me, jumping and barking welcoming me home. I love the way he runs to the top of the sofa and when I approach him he jams he head into my arm and lets out these sounds like he missed me so much it hurts. Each and every time he does this I get tears in my eyes because I know Dodger is happy and he loves me and where he lives.

Dodger is more than a simple little dog. He’s very much like a child to me. My friends will tell you that I’ve skipped doing things with them if Dodger can’t go and if I’m away too long I remind them that I must get back home because he’s alone. Even on the last trip to the Bay Are when he stayed with friends I know I drove my friends crazy because all the way I kept saying how much I missed him. I asked the friends he stayed with to send me pictures of him. I think I even asked to speak with him too.

People who don’t have a dog can never understand the bond I feel with my little man. Everyone with a dog they truly love will go above and beyond to make sure their little pooch is happy, from the food and treats they eat, to the trips and play dates they go on. Dogs are so special and they get inside your heart as only they can do. Even when they piss on your coffee table or shit in your favorite shoes or drag your one and only laptop all over the floor and destroy it, you can’t stay mad at them.

Dodger is so much more than a little dog. He is my friend and his love is unconditional and I know most humans could not come close to the love and friendship he bestows on me each and every day without fail.

Back in the days when PositiveLite.com was young and goofy (well, goofier) we had a regular feature called Furry Friends Friday.  When Brian and I weren’t featuring the foibles of our respective dogs, I’d dredge YouTube for videos of singing cats or goats that fell over or – well you get the picture. But underneath there was serious intent – to acknowledge the important place that animals and pets have in our lives, quite often more so for people living with HIV.

Every year around Christmas - and this is the fourth in PositiveLite.com’s history  - we’ve also featured a holiday-themed Furry Friends Friday post  - in which typically I’d drag out our three dogs, dress them up in something ridiculously Santa-related and have them pose for the camera. And pose and pose and pose, because believe me, when you have three dogs they NEVER pose right the first time or the tenth, or even the hundredth. We are talking lots of shots here to get one good one. Thank god for the digital age.

It doesn’t help of course that two of our three dogs are basset hounds, not the brightest breed in the world, although arguably the most lovable.

In any event, the result is that while Furry Friends Friday – The Holiday Edition – never looked like my three pooches were having much fun (and this year’s effort is no exception) it was all about the bond that exists between us and our pets, even if they hate us at times like this. Look at my three in the photo above (left to right Dougall, Dudley and Peggy) and you can see they are NOT amused. Dogs seldom smile, they express their happiness in other ways, but that doesn’t prevent them from looking decidedly pissed-off when the situation calls for it.

Anyway, we like to be inclusive here, so a pissed-off Christmas is perfectly acceptable in our books.

As an aside, many people ask how you get the three animals to look at the camera simultaneously. There are several answers to this.  The first is that for most of the 100-plus shots that it takes to produce just one like this, they aren’t, or at least one dog isn’t. The second answer is that sometimes treats held strategically near the camera help them to focus. And the third is that it really helps to have a second person, your designated dog whisperer, to assist.

Try it at home. Because your pets can look pissed off too.

Happy holidays everyone!

This article first appeared in The Positive Side, a publication of CATIE.

Une version française est disponible ici. 

Interviews by RonniLyn Pustil

Mark Lipton, 43, Toronto, HIV+: 17 years

Dog: Bingo Falafel Lipton, 14

Breed: Rat terrier

Nicknames: Bingus, Bakalaka, Mr. Handsome.

What made you decide to get a pet?

I didn’t. My ex-boyfriend came home one day in 1998 and said: “I got you a present. This will save your life.” And he presented me with this crazy puppy he had rescued. I’d been having difficulty dealing with my HIV diagnosis. Many of our friends were dying and I was feeling very lonely and depressed.

And did Bingo save your life?

Yes, in many ways. He also got between me and the boyfriend, and when I had to choose between them, I took the dog and ran. For the first few years Bingo didn’t let me have strang­ers in the house. He would bark at them or attack them, which forced me to choose who I brought home more carefully. In this way, he kept me in check.

How does Bingo affect your quality of life?

He keeps me active because I have to go to the park with him several times a day. He keeps me centred because I have to step away from whatever I’m doing and give him my focused attention a few times a day. He reminds me to eat, because when I feed him, I remember to eat myself.

Does he still attack strangers?

He’s mellowed as he’s gotten older. Also, I’ve since gotten married and my husband is much better at domesticating and training him. I had accepted that I had a wild dog, but my husband has tamed him…and me as well!

Does Bingo do any tricks?

Absolutely! Bingo can sing. And he can balance a cookie on the tip of his nose and hold it there until you say “go!” Then he flips it and catches it in his mouth. 

What has Bingo taught you?

He’s taught me to breathe, to trust and to stretch. He’s taught me great patience. He’s taught me how to love.

Richard Baker, 42, St John’s, Newfoundland, HIV+: 24 years

Dog: Charlie, 9 months

Breed: Border collie and lab mix

Nickname: Charlie Brown

Why did you decide to get a pet?

My partner and I lost Sonny, our 10-year-old black lab, last May. Shortly after, we realized we couldn’t live without a dog. So we started looking for a small dog (Sonny was 120 pounds). I found out that there was someone looking for a good home for a 10-week-old pup that was left on their doorstep. When we went to see him, we fell in love, but he was going to be big. We thought for a minute and then found out that he was born the day that Sonny passed away. Talk about karma! We had to get him.

How does having a pet affect your quality of life?

Charlie makes me feel needed. He motivates me to go outside for walks, which is hard for me with my medical conditions. And without him, my mental health would be a lot worse.

Does Charlie do any tricks?

He can pick up bricks with his teeth and carry them around the yard.

What has your dog taught you?

That love, laughter and patience go a long way.

Charlene Anderson, 50, Victoria, BC, HIV+: 21 years

2 cats: Min, 12, and Mr. V., 5. When we first got Mr. V., they said he was a girl so we called him Miss Vivien, but then he developed testicles so we changed his name.

Dog: Pekoe, 4

Breed: Pug

Nicknames: Pekoe is the only one with nicknames—Pig and Squeako.

How do your pets affect your quality of life?

They make me participate in life. Having responsibilities makes me accountable, especially having a dog. I have to walk her a few times a day, which keeps me motivated. I’ve developed some good relationships because of her; there’s a group of us that goes on dog walks five days a week. And she keeps me calm. When things are going on, there’s nothing better than having my little Pig curl up in my lap. It’s unconditional love from all three of them.

Do they all get along?

Yes, but the dog knows that she’s at the bottom of the food chain. When the cats go by, she just looks the other way.

Do any of your pets have remarkable talents?

Pekoe does everything: She rolls over on command, dances and gives you a high five and high 10. She also enjoys dressing up. In Victoria we have the Big Gay Dog Walk, as part of Pride week activities. Pekoe has won the prize for best tricks and the prize for best-dressed pet—she wore her pleather vest and rainbow tutu. She was in the newspaper; they called her “the essence of Pride.”

What have your pets taught you?

Pekoe has taught me to not judge people. We go to an off-leash dog park where you get the big burly dogs with their big burly owners who look scary until you get them to talk about their dogs and they turn to mush. Also, I volunteer and I’m on the board at AIDS Vancouver Island. I bring Pekoe there sometimes and she loves everybody unconditionally.

Brenda Campbell, 54, Regina, Saskatchewan, HIV+: 2 years

14 cats: Pinky, Sambo, Babykins, Cocoa, Noodles, Miss Tippi, Rascal, Peekaboo, Minnie, Jellybean, BJ, the Bear, PJ and Pinto, the kitten.

Whoa! How do you keep track of them all?

I try to keep them inside because I live on a busy street. When they do go out, they always come home, except for Rascal. That one I’ve got to watch. 

Do you have any favourites?

Babykins—and he knows it. He’s spoiled rotten. He sleeps with me all the time, just curls up in my arms. He’s adorable. Of course, they’re all adorable. Sambo’s the gay cat. I always have to chase him to get him off Babykins. He’s also toothless.

Why 14 cats?

I’m the cat lady! My eyes are green and my sign is Leo. Some people actually know me as the cat lady; they don’t know my real name. I have so many because no one wanted the kittens from the last batch, so I ended up keeping them.

Are there ever any catfights?

Sometimes. When the full moon is out, they act up.

How do your cats affect your quality of life?

If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t be around now. I’ve been off cocaine for over three years because I realized that I wasn’t taking good care of my cats. They are more important to me than drugs. I’m a breast cancer survivor, I have MS, hepatitis C and HIV. My cats give me the will to live. It’s hard work taking care of myself and all the cats, but it’s worth it.

Do any of your cats do special tricks?

Sambo used to steal my bra every time I went into the bath. Also, he doesn’t usually cuddle up with me, but whenever I get my cheque, he curls up to me. It’s like he knows it’s tuna day.

What have your cats taught you?

I grew up on the streets, and my cats have taught me that I could love and be loved unconditionally. 

Denise Becker, 53, Vernon, BC, HIV+: 22 years

Dog: Ziggy, 3

Breed: Doberman pinscher

Nicknames: The Zigster, The Zigmeister, Zig, Puppy Dog, Poppit. His show name is Liberty’s Walks with a Friend. 

Why did you decide to get a dog?

Why not? They are the greatest companions. Dobermans are smart, short-haired, loyal, indoor dogs—and they’re great defenders. They are also astoundingly good at picking up men.

Does having a dog affect your quality of life?

Absolutely! When I am sad, he comes over and licks my tears. In the morning, he gets me out of bed with incessant whining. During the night, he gets up and comes to my side of the bed just to check on me and then returns to his bed. He sleeps on my feet, which is not only warm but also comforting. He makes me feel safe from intruders when I am on my own.

Does Ziggy have any remarkable talents?

When I say “dead dog,” he falls to the ground; then when I say “doggy heaven,” he circles the table; and finally when I say “pearly gates!” he reaches up and licks my nose. He’s a show dog so he can stand like a statue for about a minute without moving. He licks me when I say “kisses” and he licks my boyfriend when I say “Kirk kisses.”

What has your dog taught you?

Ziggy has taught me to always forgive. Dogs seem to have huge hearts and forgive humans for some crazy things. Also, he’s taught me that he will never judge me for anything and he would defend me to the end. He’s sad when I am away and glad when I come home. He makes me feel wanted and needed—in fact, loved.

Is it true that Ziggy has his own Twitter page? What does he tweet about?

Yes. I am amazed at all the other dogs and cats that have befriended him. Ziggy tweets a lot about his owner and writes things like “Breakfast: kibbles again!” His Twitter handle is @akaLordVader

May 07, 2012 CAT BITE FOLLOW-UP

Well, I got a good bill of health from the hospital this morning, my wound is healing quite quickly…………but I’m being put on one more bout of oral antibiotics just to be safe, because of me being HIV+.  It was an extremely long week waiting in emergency four hours per day for the first three days.  I was then given home care for the rest of the week.  While I was there this morning to be reassessed, our lovely Karaoke Host sat beside me.  She was in for chest pains, and I only hope she made out alright…………..gee it sure is a small world sometimes.

I forgot to mention…………the gentleman I spoke with in the park yesterday voiced his concerns with respect to sending off my blogs directly to the Shepard Family.  He feels there is always that 1% chance that this could have a negative response, and suggested I contact them directly.  Funny, I said,  I’ve at times somewhat felt this way myself. My biggest concern has always been towards the Shepard family feeling like their son’s death has become a big theatrical showcase. I only hope they have never felt this way.  Theatre becomes something different when you’re acting out real life scenarios.  There were many times rehearsing as Dennis Shepard that I nearly broke out in tears, and I suppose I feel professional enough to create this from an audiences stand point, but also not wanting to interrupt my performance…………this is not an easy task by any means.  I can honestly say this experience brought out in me again the love I have for the arts in general.  I only hope to have other opportunities in the future.

May 14, 2012 ADDITIONAL OPPORTUNITIES WHILE SURVIVING ON A FIXED INCOME

I’m proud to announce that the Artistic Director for the Rainbow Choir in Guelph, Ontario, approached myself and one other person that performed in the Laramie Project, only a couple of days following our closing performance which he attended.  He asked us both if we would be interested in doing a short narration to introduce the songs being sung by the choir.  It’s rather humorous dialogue mostly between the two of us, or at least we hope it will be, and rather refreshing after having been in the Laramie Project – 10 yrs later.  We haven’t much time to rehearse.  We have a performance already this Saturday May 26^th, and another one next Sunday June 3^rd.  It's been lots of fun and I hope you’ll be able to attend, as the choir sounds wonderful also. 

May 22, 2012 AFFORDING PET CARE

Well, I might be able to afford to keep my one cat Digby after all. This has been tearing me apart, as he has been so affectionate since our battle in the yard a few weeks ago. Besides his brother JD would certainly miss him greatly. This has been hard juggling finances to accommodate this, but you do what you have to do, or what feels right.  I have only a couple of days to get him his rabies shot as per Public Health, which should be fun getting him in the carrier to take him to the vet.  He has never been in one, and he even lay in the front seat of car when I brought him home as a kitten.  I just feel it’s getting harder and harder to own a pet. It's become such a business to make money, and I really don’t understand once you’ve got your dog a license, why on earth it has to be renewed every year either

One last thing before I close off this portion. We had our cast party for the Laramie Project – 10 yrs later this past weekend, and it was so much fun, hearing us all reminiscing about the whole project and the huge impact it had on us all.  And I succeeded in finalizing my portfolio of blogs to send to the Shepard Family Foundation,>  Everyone there was quite excited to see the final layout, it turned out wonderfully.  As I said earlier, when an opportunity comes knocking at your door, it’s often the appropriate thing to pursue at that time and make the best of it.

Hello again everyone. 

I’m so angry with myself………………2 days following the performances I found myself on the wrong end of a cat fight.

A week ago I woke up early  - it was 7:30 am  - and headed outside with my coffee and cig, and of course the two cats for their morning feeding on grass in the front yard. Yes, this would be Digby and JD that I spoke about in one of my previous blogs.  They both immediately went over to one spot along the fence and I thought they were checking out some dead carcus.  It turned out to be the scent of a female cat that had been in the yard the night before.  JD is fixed whereas Digby is not, this encouraged an outrage towards JD and of course I felt obligated to come to his rescue.

Oops…….I tried to kick Digby off of him and he then turned on my ankle.  I wasn’t thinking too straight at 7:30 in the morning in my robe and slippers.

The last male cat I had broke out through the living room window and took off for 3 days to do his thing.  And I might add, he would only come back in through the window not the front door.  We’ve had pets for many years……….the difference with Digby is he is afraid to leave the front yard…………again I wasn’t thinking.

Anyhow, I went to emergency but not until the next night, at this point running a temperature. I’ve spent the last week getting antibiotics intravenously, today having been the last one I hope.  I go back to the hospital tomorrow to have it reassessed.

Public Health called earlier in the week to follow up things…………..needless to say Digby will be getting his shots and being fixed soon.  I have to wait out the 2 week period to see if he has rabies.  He’s an indoor cat, afraid to go anywhere, and only goes in the yard when one of us is present. 

Their question to me was did I do anything to provoke the fight?  Well, we’ve had him as a kitten and has never showed his teeth in the past 3 years or longer.  I realize he should have been fixed, however, I don’t allow my cats to freely run the neighbourhood, and unfortunately some people do and that’s what caused all this.  And I don’t think I’m going to provoke a cat fight at 7:30 on a Sunday morning.

The cost for all of this is going to be through the roof for someone on a fixed income, but you do what you gotta do.

 I’m stunned at the cost of having pets, but the humane society keeps on asking people to adopt.  A woman in the neighbourhood spent nearly a thousand dollars to have both her cats taken care of.  I called a vet out of town and it will be nearly 400.00 with taxes for mine.  So there you have it in a nutshell.

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I spoke with a gentleman walking Sadie in the park today.  He needed someone to talk to obviously……………..most of our 2 hr converstion pertained to the recent 1 yr anniversary of having to put his horse down.  The horse had a spinal disease and caused it to start walking with a dumb leg.  His love for this horse poured out of his soul and he was heading off to the stables to visit his horse's spot.  He had the horse cremated but kept his tail to hang in his stable.  It was a very touching conversation on such a beautiful day in our new Victoria park.  He couldn’t stress enough the importance a horse can have on your life, and animals in general.  His small dog was there with him also…………nearly 15 yrs old. The man hopes he dies naturally.

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I need to find topics to talk about.  The Laramie Project had such an overpowering effect on me, and I’m still battling what my next adventure will be to both blog about and entail my life in.

Talk again soon.

Photo by Bob Leahy