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Brian Finch

Brian Finch

Brian Finch, founder and publisher of Positive Lite. I've had a blog since 2005 when I decided one day that I just wanted to write. Since then I've grown to writing for a local Toronto magazine, Fab, and contribute to MyGayToronto.com.

I first went public in the 1980s, and with the exception of a few years of taking a break, have not really stopped. Life is an evolution, and for the last six years I've brought everyone along for the ride, the good, the bad & the ugly.

Today I share stories of my lastest recarnation of life of a publisher, traveler, recovery, a new relationship, my three-pound Chihuahua Hildy, converting to Judaism and where ever else my journey takes me.

May29

GTJ - Transitioning - Goy to Jew

Tuesday, 29 May 2012 Written by // Brian Finch - Founder Categories // Gay Men, Lifestyle, Opinion Pieces, Population Specific , Brian Finch

Brian Finch: "After a journey of several years, really starting in Africa, I look back and I think that I’d become so jaded that it took at trip to Africa and Rwanda’s genocide survivors for my soul to wake up."

GTJ - Transitioning - Goy to Jew

"I really like Jewish guys, so I'm getting my ducks in a row." That's my response to those who ask me about why I decided to convert. Other than that I'd say I'm in the spiritual "trans" category. 

I’ve written about my conversion to Judaism, as many know about. I haven’t written a lot about it, mostly because not everyone can understand this process or even desire to. It’s very difficult to convey what it is all about if you haven’t truly experienced Jewish life and values. 

After a journey of several years, really starting in Africa, I look back and I think that I’d become so jaded that it took at trip to Africa and Rwanda’s genocide survivors for my soul to wake up.

I did not, though, just wake up and say, “Hey I want to become Jewish.” Rather it was a slow process weaving each experience in with another until a new tapestry had formed, which is what I call life today.

The transformation from start to this date has been one I wouldn’t have believed if someone were to tell me five-years ago. I live a Jewish life, I attend Shabbat services and participate in the downtown Jewish community.

Meanwhile, I turned over my successful venture PostiveLite..com to new hands to take it to the next level. I realized that I am a “creator”, not a manager. This is a great personal revelation. We need creators just as much as we need managers and those who can take projects on for the long haul.

I’m a Gemini Taurus cusp, which basically means I’m stubbornly fucked up. It also means I need a lot of change, something of which I’ve had lots.

For some reason I don’t think it was an accident that I got into the Stephen Lewis Foundation Dare Campaign that in turn got me into stand-up. I’ve wanted to do it for two years, in fact ever since I started PositiveLite.com. Yet the circumstances for it to come together finally took place while in the middle of my inner personal transformation. 

The result is that I’ve found my spiritual home. When I say spiritual home, I mean much more than Judaism.  Judaism was the vehicle that opened up the door for me. When I first walked into a synagogue (schul) I was terrified to be myself. I was so timid, so quiet. I had been really out there in my life, but only within certain circles. Take me out of those safety zones and I become a shy, awkward, geeked-out kind of guy.

The further in this process I walked, the more comfortable I became with just being myself. I was now primed to go on to stand-up. It couldn’t have happened any other way.  

Next week I write my final test for this nine-month long course.

I’ve made some great friends in the course, and now have a couple of weddings to go to in August. I’ll miss our gossip sessions on the TTC heading back home. 

There are three ritual processes to go through before one get’s an official “Vey or Ney”

Bet Din, the rabbinical court, is booked for June 6th. It’s a 15-min chat. Once this point in the process is reached, 99% of those who come to be interviewed are approved.

The next step is getting my prick pricked and blessed. After that happens, I’m going to advertise that I’ll have the most kosher virgin freshly Jewish cock for pride. There’s got to be some Jewish boy who’d like to help me lose my Judaic virginity. I’ll put it on Craig’s List if I have to.

But wait, before I get too ahead of myself (pun wasn’t intended but I’m leaving it), there still remains one more piece to this ritual triptych. Finally I have to go into the Mikveh, pool of water, go for a dip and repeat a prayer, and then I’m done. I give them my Hebrew name, and I get my papers. I call this part, my “spa date.”

Finally it will be done.

Thank “Christ” it’s almost over (I can still say that for a two more weeks).

 

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